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The Family Journal
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Family Beginnings: A Comparison of Spouses’ Recollections of Courtship

James J. Ponzetti, Jr.

University of British Columbia

Family stories are replete with tales about why spouses married and what occurred. Spouses construct their courtship stories in such a way as to capture the unique quality of their relationship as well as chronicle family beginnings. The purpose of this study is to describe and compare spouses’ recollections concerning the events preceding their marriages and the reasons surrounding their decision to marry. One hundred twenty-four spouses were interviewed. Husbands reported longer courtships and typically made a formal marriage proposal. Wives offered more reasons for marriage in their accounts. Dyadic reasons were reported most often by both spouses for their decisions to marry. The conveyance of courtship stories contributes insight into how spouses wish to recount their relationship history to future generations. Furthermore, the comparison of spousal perspectives leads to greater profundity regarding the construction of a shared account for the decision to marry.

Key Words: courtship accounts • mate selection • relationship memories

The Family Journal, Vol. 13, No. 2, 132-138 (2005)
DOI: 10.1177/1066480704271249
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